To Be Honest

My lovely friend Allison nominated me to participate in the 'Honest Weblog.' Always looking for inspiration to get me thinking in a different direction, I am more than happy to give this a shot.

I am to write ten honest things about myself.

1. I met Allison when I lived in Spain for a semester. Living in Spain was one of the best things I ever did. I've always thought of my self as shy, not adventurous, and fairly average. But I continue to amaze myself with all of the interesting things I do. I moved to Spain! We traveled to Morocco. I now live in Hawaii! If I could sit down across the table from myself I would try to get Jenni to understand that she really isn't shy, average or afraid of adventure.

2. I get really bad migraines. Sometimes they are so bad that I get sick. When we were in Morocco I got a very bad migraine one night when we were hanging out in a Moroccan home. I remember trying to lie down on a rock-hard bed/couch thing. I remember adorable children running around and screaming with delight that just made my head hurt even more. And to my utter shame, I remember throwing up in a stone hole in a courtyard. To this day I am terrified that I threw up in this home's water well. And if I actually did that, I cannot imagine how they fixed the situation.

3. I cannot stand the sound of blowing your nose. My nose is okay. Other people's? It takes all of my energy not to gag.

4. I don't get ice cream headaches. I get ice cream backaches. I am 100% serious. My brother gets them too and we can both confirm they hurt a lot.

5. I have a hard time telling people how much I care about them. I don't know why. I am worried I will really regret this later in life. I already regret that I wasn't more open when my grandmother was dying. At the time I was just too terrified. But I wish I could have put my in-the-moment comfort aside to have the long-term comfort of knowing I tried.

6. I will probably always consider myself a swimmer. I swam competitively for four years in high school. Since then, there have been full years that I have gone without swimming - even for fun. I probably should not categorize myself as a swimmer.

7. That said, I feel more comfortable in water than any other environment. I feel very settled and whole when I can float.

8. Just in the last few years I have realized that it is not a guarantee that I will be skinny. I have been 'tiny' for most of my life. I cannot even begin to tell you how many people have approached me throughout my life and asked "How do you stay so tiny? Do you eat like that normally? What size do you wear?" That attention always made me uncomfortable but I also always felt lucky. I do not get those questions anymore. And I eat better and am more active than I have ever been!

9. I dream of owning a flower shop someday.

10. I can't stand it when retail salespeople are rude. It makes me irate. I am their customer and they need to be polite and helpful to me. I have customers and I am always extremely polite and helpful to them. It bugs me so much that I am worried one day I will lose it and lash out at one screaming "be nice! smile!" And then I will be a crazy lady.