On Sunday I had a few of those life changing moments. Where you sort of sit up and look around and think "oh my god, this is my life."
It was during our race as I sat in seat one of the canoe (hardest seat, remember). I could hear the rest of my team cheering me on from the escort boat, I felt strong and I knew I was doing a good job. As I looked ahead of me I only saw the tip of the canoe and miles of blue ocean. I must have had a huge grin on my face and I just kept thinking "I've come a long way."
In the two and half years that we've lived in Hawaii, there have been a lot of sacrifices. We gave up a lot to leave our home and follow a dream I had. I have missed my friends more than I have ever let on. I have felt lost and wondered why I needed to be here. We've both worked jobs that would have paid us considerably more on the mainland, all the while everything costs more here. We've missed parties and weddings and baby get-togethers. We save every day of vacation to visit friends and family. There are many times that I wonder why I needed to be here. And if I've getting out of it more than I'm putting in.
Somehow on Sunday it became clear what I've gotten out of my time in Hawaii. This will sound corny and cheesy but I'll say it anyway, more for myself than for any of you. I have really grown here. I've become someone I didn't know I could be. And I like her. I've pushed so many of my comfort levels. I've made friends that are different from the people I've know throughout the rest of my life. I'm determined and dedicated and I'm proud of what I've done - in the canoe and out.
I have a feeling that when I'm 80 and look back on the chapters of my life, the one about Hawaii and paddling will be one of the best.
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2 comments:
I know EXACTLY what you mean!!! Well put
Well Jenni - we like her too and always have! We are so proud of you and all that you have accomplished.
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